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[ 詩 6 ] 반중 조홍감이 고와도 보이나니
받는이 : 이원점 엄마
작성자 : 막내딸 명옥이 2006-01-09
반중 조홍감이 고와도 보이나니

유자 아니어도 품음직도 하다만

품어가 반길 이 없으니 글로 설워하노라...


------------


'반중 조홍감이 고와도 보이나니...' 하는 시조를 학교때는 그냥 외웠었는데,
이제 그 귀절이 이렇게 구구절절 와닿을 줄이야...
정말이지 이제는 엄마가 좋아하시던 사이다, 밤만쥬, 야쿠르트가 있어도 갖다드릴 수가 없네요...

엄마는 그 하찮은 걸 사가도, 월급쟁이가 무슨 돈이 있어서 사오냐고, 맨날 그냥 오라고 하셨지요.
그리고는 오늘이 생일날 같다면서 그렇게 좋아하셨는데....
아마 잡수실걸 사가서 그런게 아니라,
내가 엄마보러 간게 그렇게 좋아서 그러셨죠?
엄마, 나 잘 살아요....
그런데도, 엄마는 차비를 못줘서 어떻하냐고 걱정하시고,
할미가 돼서 도영이 과자사먹을 돈을 줘야하는데, 못준다고 속상해 하시고......
이제는 그런 걱정을 해줄 엄마도 안계시네요.....



참, 엄마,
조금 전에 형환이한테서 전화가 걸려왔어요.
왜 자기한테 연락을 안했냐고 얼마나 섭섭해하는지...
사실, 연락하려고 무진 애를 썼는데,
내 전자수첩에 에러가 나는 바람에 연락처를 몰라서 연락을 못했거든요.
엄마한테는 자식과 다름없었는데.....
형환이도 나중에 듣고 많이 울었대요.
엄마 돌아가셔서 울고, 아무도 연락을 안해서 서운해서 울고.....
괜스레 더 미안했어요.
그래서 엄마 돌아가신지 49일 되는 날,
같이 가기로 했어요......



그런데, 밤 12시가 넘어서 전화벨이 울리길래,
얼마나 놀랬는지 몰라요.
엄마도 새벽2시 경에 돌아가셨고,
형부도 밤 12시 다돼서 돌아가셨다고 전화가 와서
늦은 밤에는 전화벨만 울려도 가슴이 철렁~해요.
오늘도 "혹시 둘째언니가??" 하는 생각에
바짝 긴장해서 전화를 받았지 뭐예요.
언니는 엄마랑 형부를 한꺼번에 보내놓고 어디 제 정신이겠어요?
우리는 언니네 계시겠거니.. 싶으면 그래도 견디지만,
언니는 거실에 나와보면 텅~비어 있을텐데......
그래서 아직 언니네 집에도 못가고 있어요.
정말로 엄마가 이 세상에 돌아가셨다는게 실감날거 같아서....
이렇게 엄마한테 편지를 쓰고,
간간이 엄마를 생각하면 눈물이 나곤 하지만,
사실 아직도 엄마가 이 세상에 안계시다는걸 실감하지 못하거든요...
정말이지 아직도 언니네 집에 계실것만 같아요.
내가 사이다하고 밤만쥬 사갖고 언니네 가면,
여전히 엄마가 거실에 계실 것만 같아요.

그래서 언니네 못가겠어요........
정말로 안계시구나... 하는 상실감을 인정하기 싫어서......
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For the most part IQ tests are based on an average score of with a standard deviation ofSTEM CELL THERAPY adult specialized cells from the patient make them revert to the embryolike stem cell condition as iPSCs then induce them to develop into the cells or tissues required for the patients treatment and put them back into the patient.For a given initial driving pulse the magnitude of the emitted NMR signal is a function of the number of hydrogen nuclei in the material.g. [url=http://acheterpropeciafrance.com]propecia puissant[/url] agInquirer aids life science organizations increase operational efficiency lower operational costs and at the same time reduce the risk of liability while improving customer satisfaction and brand loyalty.Bronchodilators albuterol may relieve symptoms.For information on how this is done see Venipuncture How to Prepare for the Test You may have to restrict food and fluids for up to hours before the test.Radiative heating by the sun.reno kidney renal ischemia renal colic Colic is intermittent spasms of pain caused by inammation and distention of an organ.The upward movement of the wings is produced by the contraction of muscle A which depresses the upper part of the thorax and causes the attached wings to move up. [url=http://viagrafordailyuseusa.com]super active viagra[/url] Pennebaker Opening Up..molesA few clinical studies have suggested that treatment with ARBs or ACE inhibitors may improve erectile function and sexual performance in patients with hypertension and metabolic syndrome Fogari et al. [url=http://shopfastbestmedfor.com]Buy Accutane[/url] bipolar disorder Mood disorder with alternating periods of mania and depression.At this point the fannedout spec trum can be photographed and identified.Thrombotic strokeAtherosclerotic lesions may be in the large arteries of the neck carotid artery disease which most commonly involves the bifurcation of the common carotid artery or in mediumsized arteries in the brain especially the middle cerebral artery MCA.Always ask your health care professional for complete information about this product and your specific health needs.keratin [url=http://cheapcialispillsfast.com]tadalista vs cialis[/url] LH .Corbis Bettmann.Instead their motivation ranged from fashionable fancy or family obligation to feelings of guilt or a religious vocation.dyn cmFrom Stedmans Medical Dictionary [url=http://edrxnewmedshop.com]overnight cialis delivery[/url] If malignant surgery is indicated.surgical puncture of the chest to remove uid from the pleural spaceYou have a personal or family history of muscular dystrophy and you are planning to have children.
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head and neck lesions RADIOLOGY AND NUCLEAR MEDICINE XRAYS ULTRASOUND MAGNETIC AND RADIO WAVES Contrast studies Computed tomography CT scans Fluoroscopy Conventional xray studies Ultrasonography Magnetic resonance imaging MRI FIGURE Summary of radiologic diagnostic techniques.Basic laboratory tests to exclude other causesConsider CBC LFTs serum electro lytes calcium TSH erythrocyte sedimentation rate and HIV testing if indicated.Symptoms A heart attack is a medical emergency. [url=http://edfastmedrxfor.com]Cialis[/url] COMMENTS You must be logged in to view the comments.A.With a penetrating chest wound air can take an easier route.in about years after De Motu Cordis and four years after Harveys death. [url=http://bestmedrxshop.com]Viagra[/url] Unlike other foods however alcohol does not contain vitamins minerals and other substances necessary for proper functioning.fungal skin infectionShe said his is excellent and he can expect total recovery.Low testosterone levels have been observed inconsistently in STZinduced diabetic and BB rats.In the sGC mice the relaxing influence of exogenous NO from sodium nitroprusside and NO gas aminocyclopropylpyrimidineylfluorobenzylHpyrazolobpyridine BAY NOindependent sGC stimulator and methylaminophenyldihydrooxopyridinylmethoxytrimethoxyphenylisoquinoline carboxylic acid sulfate salt T phosphodiesterase type inhibitor were also significantly decreased.a.He takes lovastatin.Brandwein Mary Braun Bruce A. [url=http://viagra20mgonlinebuy.com]Viagra[/url] Most laboratory tests examine stool culture for only three organisms Shigella Salmonella and Campylobacter.Epigenetic screens for identication of these effects still need to be rened and extended.Scientists say it is pretty common for male nature but this phenomenon shall be cured as soon as possible.Radioactive isotopes of other elements can be produced in a similar way.EpsteinBarr virus infection. [url=http://bestmedrxedshop.com]Viagra[/url] The effect of radiation on the healthy tissue can be reduced by frequently altering the direction of the beam passing through the body.Primary glomerular disease.Secondary causes of dyslipidemia see aboveClosed loop versus open loop obstruction With closed loop obstruction the lumen is occluded at two points by an adhesive band or hernia ring.At that point the cause was unknown.a. [url=http://achatpriligyfrance.com]acheter priligy belgique[/url] b What is the magnitude of the local charge on the sampling tip and the equal and opposite charge on the facing sample that produces this force See Appendix B.
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